Redneck pickup lines

1) Did you fart, cause you blew me away!

2) Are your parents retarded, 'cause you sure are special.

3) My Love for you is like diarrhea .. I can't hold it in.

4) Do you have a library card, 'cause I'd like to sign you out.

5) Is there a mirror in your pants, because I can see myself in them.

6) If you and I were Squirrels, I'd store my nuts in your hole.

7) You might not be the best looking girl here, but beauty is only a light switch away.

8) Man - "Fat Penguin!" Woman - "WHAT?"
Man - "I just wanted to say something that would break the ice."

9) I may not be Fred Flintstone, but I bet I can make your bed-rock.

10) I can't find my puppy, can you help me find him? I think he went into this cheap motel room.

11) Your eyes are as blue as window cleaner.

12) If you're going to regret this in the morning, we can sleep until the afternoon.

and.... the best for last!
13) Your face reminds me of a wrench, every time I think of it, my nuts tighten up.

 

i need this in my room!

 

if i could rewrite the alphabet id put u and i together!
if i said you had a nice body, would you hold it against me?

both from night at the roxbury. GOD i love that movie :P

 

LOL'd at the fat penguin. I'm going to try that at the next party I go to.