Lost my Mother
#1
10-30-2006 | 09:33 PM
Thread Starter
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46MONSTER
Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 2,208
From: Wheaton, IL
Lost my Mother
This is hard for me to talk about but, i know some of you guys know that my mother has been battling cancer for quite some time, well as of about 2 moths ago she was diagnosed with brain cancer and 4 weeks later she passed away. Up untill this point i havent talked about this to anyone, its been so hard, im not asking for any sympathy but I just wanted to let you guys know to NEVER take your parents for granted, you never know when they could be gone. i'll tell you what this has been the hardest thing I have ever had to deal with, and it doesnt seem like its going to get any easier, my mother was absolutely everything to me and my brothers.
i wanted to know of if anyone have you been through something like this how you dealt with it.
Here is a link to the obituary-
http://www.meaningfulfunerals.net/fh...43&fh_id=10184
Thanks,
Joe
i wanted to know of if anyone have you been through something like this how you dealt with it.
Here is a link to the obituary-
http://www.meaningfulfunerals.net/fh...43&fh_id=10184
Thanks,
Joe
#2
10-30-2006 | 09:45 PM
Guest
Posts: n/a
Man, im really sorry to hear about this.. It's hard to lose a loved one, but I think you just have to remember the good times and remember all of the good memories.
I wish you and your family all of the best, just remember you'll make it through these tough times.
God Bless.
I wish you and your family all of the best, just remember you'll make it through these tough times.
God Bless.
#3
10-30-2006 | 09:48 PM
Mustang Superman
Joined: May 2005
Posts: 3,907
From: Your mom's bed
This is hard for me to talk about but, i know some of you guys know that my mother has been battling cancer for quite some time, well as of about 2 moths ago she was diagnosed with brain cancer and 4 weeks later she passed away. Up untill this point i havent talked about this to anyone, its been so hard, im not asking for any sympathy but I just wanted to let you guys know to NEVER take your parents for granted, you never know when they could be gone. i'll tell you what this has been the hardest thing I have ever had to deal with, and it doesnt seem like its going to get any easier, my mother was absolutely everything to me and my brothers.
i wanted to know of if anyone have you been through something like this how you dealt with it.
Here is a link to the obituary-
http://www.meaningfulfunerals.net/fh...43&fh_id=10184
Thanks,
Joe
i wanted to know of if anyone have you been through something like this how you dealt with it.
Here is a link to the obituary-
http://www.meaningfulfunerals.net/fh...43&fh_id=10184
Thanks,
Joe
#4
10-30-2006 | 09:49 PM
Junior Member
Joined: Oct 2006
Posts: 12
Joe - So sorry to hear about your Mother. You'll be in my thoughts. I have not experienced the loss of someone this close to me, so I can't offer any meaningful advice other than what was said above...remember the good times. Take care of yourself.
Justin
Justin
#6
10-30-2006 | 10:11 PM
Guest
Posts: n/a
I know how it is to go through this, i was raised with my grandparents. I have an older step brother and an older sister, and after I was born here, my mother went back to the country she was born to go try to bring my half brother and sister to the united states, i didn't see my mother for 6 years so my grand parents raised me so I guess you can kindof call them my parents, I recently lost both my grand parents less then 2 months ago. When my granny passed away my grandfather went through a tough time, his blood preasure raised a lot, he wouldn't eat, he got really sick and died less then a week after my granny passed away. So you can imagine how that was for me. Its tough man, its tough, the only thing that really kept me up was that I know none of them are suffering anymore from their health conditions and that one day i'll see them again.
i'll pray for your mother, shes in a way better place now and wont be suffering anymore, dont worry man, you'll see her again when your time is up. She will always be looking after you. God bless man.
i'll pray for your mother, shes in a way better place now and wont be suffering anymore, dont worry man, you'll see her again when your time is up. She will always be looking after you. God bless man.
#8
10-30-2006 | 10:44 PM
Administrator
Joined: Sep 2004
Posts: 6,613
As you can see, you are not alone.
I lost my dad who was a teacher for many years at WNHS (your HS). He was much loved by many in the community. He too dies from cancer. When he died, I was married and had my children already. It was easier for me...a lot easier then my younger sibs, especially the youngest which were still in HS. I felt bad for them because I knew that they had been robbed of the time that I had with my dad.
In all honesty, I handled the loss of my father pretty well. My dad and I had an understanding and I know that he had a good life even if it had been cut a bit short. Just one year earlier, I had lost my daughter....also to cancer. So, my father's death seemed less painful to me.
What has gotten me through these challenges is this:
I have refused to let cancer beat me! No...I don't mean me personally getting sick. What I mean is that even after a loved-one passes on from cancer, cancer can continue to destroy the survivors if you let it. You can either be depressed and miserable, or you can live your life. I was 33 years old when my daughter died. I had a wife, another daughter, and a baby on the way. My family needed me to be strong...I was not gonna let cancer ruin my family, ruin my job, and ruin my life anymore then it already had.
Sure, you need to deal with the loss of your mother. Certainly don't ignore that. But as soon as you can turn your loss in a constructive manner, you will begin to feel better because you will be honoring your Mom just by the way in which you behave, and that will make you feel a lot better.
I lost my dad who was a teacher for many years at WNHS (your HS). He was much loved by many in the community. He too dies from cancer. When he died, I was married and had my children already. It was easier for me...a lot easier then my younger sibs, especially the youngest which were still in HS. I felt bad for them because I knew that they had been robbed of the time that I had with my dad.
In all honesty, I handled the loss of my father pretty well. My dad and I had an understanding and I know that he had a good life even if it had been cut a bit short. Just one year earlier, I had lost my daughter....also to cancer. So, my father's death seemed less painful to me.
What has gotten me through these challenges is this:
I have refused to let cancer beat me! No...I don't mean me personally getting sick. What I mean is that even after a loved-one passes on from cancer, cancer can continue to destroy the survivors if you let it. You can either be depressed and miserable, or you can live your life. I was 33 years old when my daughter died. I had a wife, another daughter, and a baby on the way. My family needed me to be strong...I was not gonna let cancer ruin my family, ruin my job, and ruin my life anymore then it already had.
Sure, you need to deal with the loss of your mother. Certainly don't ignore that. But as soon as you can turn your loss in a constructive manner, you will begin to feel better because you will be honoring your Mom just by the way in which you behave, and that will make you feel a lot better.
#11
10-31-2006 | 06:51 AM
Cops Love Me!
Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 1,499
From: Winder, GA
Sorry for your loss man. God Bless, I'l keep you and your family in my prayers. I lost my grandfather over 2 years ago and to this day I think about him daily. Stay strong and know that she isn't suffering at all anymore!
AJ
AJ
#13
10-31-2006 | 08:56 AM
I like to whine...
Joined: Aug 2005
Posts: 1,640
Whatever you may do man, just keep your head up and keep striving for success because that is what all mothers want for their children. Sorry to hear about your loss man and I hope everything works out well for you and your family. I will you all in my thoughts.
#14
10-31-2006 | 09:08 AM
Super Moderator
Joined: Aug 2005
Posts: 2,931
From: Randallstown, Md
Damn Joe, very sorry to hear this. I know what your feeling, we just burried my uncle last week, who died from cancer. another one of my friends died last friday also from cancer, Sandy West who was best known as the drummer for the all female rock-band the Runaways. my heart and prayers go-out to everyone.
#17
10-31-2006 | 05:28 PM
Beantown Stang
Joined: Dec 2005
Posts: 1,375
From: Boston, MA
ah ****...., sucks man, I'm sorry I cant even imagine how it would be to loose a loved one especially a parent.. I keep trying to get my father to stop smoking and hes been in the hospital twice for it and it just kills me to see him continue to smoke.... but sorry for your loss and hope you feel better and move on, hey its the part of life that everyone has to go through eventually.. some sooner then another...
#18
10-31-2006 | 05:37 PM
Nitrous Injected 3.8
Joined: Oct 2006
Posts: 2,881
From: Bakersfield, CA
I don't know what to say to help you except do not let depression get the best of you. You are still able to keep your memories of her, and atleast you now know that she isn't suffering from her disease.
I haven't had a parent die, but I have had two of my close friends die in the past year. One to a wreck, and one to suicide. The best things you can do is remember her, and continue moving forward and doing good with your life.
When you start to hurt, talk to people, it doesn't have to be about her unless you want it to, but just keep yourself social.
She may not be a phone call away or anything anymore, but she will always be watching over you..
I haven't had a parent die, but I have had two of my close friends die in the past year. One to a wreck, and one to suicide. The best things you can do is remember her, and continue moving forward and doing good with your life.
When you start to hurt, talk to people, it doesn't have to be about her unless you want it to, but just keep yourself social.
She may not be a phone call away or anything anymore, but she will always be watching over you..
#19
11-01-2006 | 07:25 AM
CMAC
Joined: Oct 2004
Posts: 1,085
From: Tucson, AZ
it took me a while to post on this thread because it's comming up on 2 years now that my dad passed away. I'm very sorry for your loss man. I know exactly how it feels to loose a parent. It's one of those things that linger around and never goes away. Please don't go the route that i went though. I went into a deep depression which i'm still working on....and turned to drugs which almost ruined my life.
It only gets better with time and even then it's not better. Keep your head up man. Stay focused. You gotta stay in the game for the rest of your fam. That's how i look at it now. Be easy man.
It only gets better with time and even then it's not better. Keep your head up man. Stay focused. You gotta stay in the game for the rest of your fam. That's how i look at it now. Be easy man.
#21
11-01-2006 | 08:50 AM
Super Moderator
Joined: Sep 2004
Posts: 6,075
Sorry to hear about your mom. I had the same situation,my mom had a brain tumor that was dicovered after she was unable to get out of bed. My mom was a single mother with 3 kids and she managed to buy a home for us. She worked in a factory as a seamstress and cleaned bathrooms to aquire the american dream. My only regret is that I was unable to complete my promise to myself to support my mom so she would not have to work. I instead help out my brother and sister as my mom has always done.
Whats important is that you and your family do more things together as we are on borrowed time. Working 60plus hours and spending to much time on cars,net or other stuff is just not important compared to spending time with your loved ones.
No one can replace your mom as she gave birth to you and loves you like no other but there is someone that loves you so much that he gave his only son. You are never alone but are being carried by our Lord through your most difficult times as long as you truly want him in your life. This and only this helped me through my moms death and hopefully you can see that you are never alone. I always ask for his will to be done as what do I know whats best for me. Maybe my mom being alive she would of been murdered by someone or maybe me getting my car back to early I would of gotten into an accident and would of been killed. We just dont know but I can sleep good at night praying for his wisdom to guide me through life. I ask everyone to pray for his mother to be in our Lords presense and remember dont only pray when you need but when you have it good. Spread the word.
Whats important is that you and your family do more things together as we are on borrowed time. Working 60plus hours and spending to much time on cars,net or other stuff is just not important compared to spending time with your loved ones.
No one can replace your mom as she gave birth to you and loves you like no other but there is someone that loves you so much that he gave his only son. You are never alone but are being carried by our Lord through your most difficult times as long as you truly want him in your life. This and only this helped me through my moms death and hopefully you can see that you are never alone. I always ask for his will to be done as what do I know whats best for me. Maybe my mom being alive she would of been murdered by someone or maybe me getting my car back to early I would of gotten into an accident and would of been killed. We just dont know but I can sleep good at night praying for his wisdom to guide me through life. I ask everyone to pray for his mother to be in our Lords presense and remember dont only pray when you need but when you have it good. Spread the word.
#23
11-01-2006 | 05:24 PM
Thread Starter
|
46MONSTER
Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 2,208
From: Wheaton, IL
Sorry to hear about your mom. I had the same situation,my mom had a brain tumor that was dicovered after she was unable to get out of bed. My mom was a single mother with 3 kids and she managed to buy a home for us. She worked in a factory as a seamstress and cleaned bathrooms to aquire the american dream. My only regret is that I was unable to complete my promise to myself to support my mom so she would not have to work. I instead help out my brother and sister as my mom has always done.
Whats important is that you and your family do more things together as we are on borrowed time. Working 60plus hours and spending to much time on cars,net or other stuff is just not important compared to spending time with your loved ones.
No one can replace your mom as she gave birth to you and loves you like no other but there is someone that loves you so much that he gave his only son. You are never alone but are being carried by our Lord through your most difficult times as long as you truly want him in your life. This and only this helped me through my moms death and hopefully you can see that you are never alone. I always ask for his will to be done as what do I know whats best for me. Maybe my mom being alive she would of been murdered by someone or maybe me getting my car back to early I would of gotten into an accident and would of been killed. We just dont know but I can sleep good at night praying for his wisdom to guide me through life. I ask everyone to pray for his mother to be in our Lords presense and remember dont only pray when you need but when you have it good. Spread the word.
Whats important is that you and your family do more things together as we are on borrowed time. Working 60plus hours and spending to much time on cars,net or other stuff is just not important compared to spending time with your loved ones.
No one can replace your mom as she gave birth to you and loves you like no other but there is someone that loves you so much that he gave his only son. You are never alone but are being carried by our Lord through your most difficult times as long as you truly want him in your life. This and only this helped me through my moms death and hopefully you can see that you are never alone. I always ask for his will to be done as what do I know whats best for me. Maybe my mom being alive she would of been murdered by someone or maybe me getting my car back to early I would of gotten into an accident and would of been killed. We just dont know but I can sleep good at night praying for his wisdom to guide me through life. I ask everyone to pray for his mother to be in our Lords presense and remember dont only pray when you need but when you have it good. Spread the word.
thanks venom, I appreciate it!!
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