possums are some mean looking mofo's

DarkSith · 02-04-2006, 09:14 PM

So, my dogs been barking for like an hour straight, and pretty soon shes under my car port barking. It was driving me crazy, by this time my brother comes and tells me that my two dogs have a possum traped under my car. So I get my keys and an old ax handle on the way out, I try and hit the possum with the ax handle to make it run away. The stupid thing just sits there and hisses, so I get in my car and back it up. My chow emiddietly gabs the possums and walks away with it. My huskey follows, the possum is playing dead while my to dogs are biteing the hell out of it. My chow bit it and I heard a couple bones pop, I start to feel bad for it. It's just sitting there being eaten alive, so I pick up a piece of a dead tree and smack it in the head, I was hopeing to knock it unconsious. It hissed a little then started playing dead again, so I smacked it again. The front of the possum whent limp and the back just starded wiggleing. So I figgered it was dead, I walked away and came back a little later and the thing was still alive. So I grabed the ax handle nudged my dogs away, then smacked it in the head. The things eye ball pops out, I hit it a few more times just to make sure its dead. Then my chow came back over and started smelling it.

Thats the first live possum I've came in counter with, usually I just find them dead in our yard. All I know is that those things look scary as hell when there mad.

Look over any grammer mistakes, I don't feel like proof reading that.

So The end.

*Lances03SVT* · 02-04-2006, 09:16 PM

Yea they act mean as hell for sure.I've had a few get on my back porch.

Chuck Norris · 02-04-2006, 09:21 PM

F*ck opossums.

02-04-2006, 09:23 PM

LMAO!!!!!!!!!!
Dude, PETA would hate me for this but that right there was about the funniest goddamn thing i read all night.

LMAO

I could almost hear it in the voice of Billy Bob Thorton off Slingblade.
Dat derre is a possum. dog be chewein dat dere pussum a bit. I reckon i put better put it down. i get my stick and hit it. *****um moves. i hit it again. moves and i hit it again. dog bites it some more. hit it again. dat dere possum eye pop out, plum near took his head off.
bizgits and murrard uhmmm hummmm.

Badfish · 02-04-2006, 09:25 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jack The Ripper

LMAO!!!!!!!!!!
Dude, PETA would hate me for this but that right there was about the funniest goddamn thing i read all night.

I could almost hear it in the voice of Billy Bob Thorton off Slingblade.
Dat derre is a possum. dog be chewein dat dere pussum a bit. I reckon i put better put it down. i get my stick and hit it. *****um moves. i hit it again. moves and i hit it again. dog bites it some more. hit it again. dat dere possum eye pop out, plum near took his head off.
bizgits and murrard uhmmm hummmm.

LMAO
roflmao!!

that story was godamned hilarious

RedFirevert04GT · 02-04-2006, 11:47 PM

ROFL!!! That's some funny **** right there. We had a beagle growing up and about 2 nights a week she would tree a possum and bark at it all night long. Dad would have to drag her in the house still barking. Even once she was in the house she'd whimper and whine. Finally one night she treed this thing on a branch that was just barely too high for her to get to, until the possum let it's tail down to tease her. She grabbed ahold of the tail and ripped the possum outta the tree. The next morning we found her sitting on the carport with a half eaten possum carcass with a million dollar grin. We finally got a good night's sleep the next night.

MattJ · 02-05-2006, 12:54 AM

My dogs got 3 rabbits this week, and reminants of another.

Damn dogs try to bring em in the house too. They sit at the back door with a huge jackrabbit in there mouth expecting to come in the house with that damnn thing

02-04-2006, 09:14 PM	#1 (permalink)
DarkSith Victory Is Mine Join Date: Jun 2005 Location: Lake City, SC Posts: 1,327	possums are some mean looking mofo's So, my dogs been barking for like an hour straight, and pretty soon shes under my car port barking. It was driving me crazy, by this time my brother comes and tells me that my two dogs have a possum traped under my car. So I get my keys and an old ax handle on the way out, I try and hit the possum with the ax handle to make it run away. The stupid thing just sits there and hisses, so I get in my car and back it up. My chow emiddietly gabs the possums and walks away with it. My huskey follows, the possum is playing dead while my to dogs are biteing the hell out of it. My chow bit it and I heard a couple bones pop, I start to feel bad for it. It's just sitting there being eaten alive, so I pick up a piece of a dead tree and smack it in the head, I was hopeing to knock it unconsious. It hissed a little then started playing dead again, so I smacked it again. The front of the possum whent limp and the back just starded wiggleing. So I figgered it was dead, I walked away and came back a little later and the thing was still alive. So I grabed the ax handle nudged my dogs away, then smacked it in the head. The things eye ball pops out, I hit it a few more times just to make sure its dead. Then my chow came back over and started smelling it. Thats the first live possum I've came in counter with, usually I just find them dead in our yard. All I know is that those things look scary as hell when there mad. Look over any grammer mistakes, I don't feel like proof reading that. So The end. __________________

02-04-2006, 09:16 PM	#2 (permalink)
Lances03SVT Super Moderator Join Date: May 2005 Location: Carthage, Missouri Posts: 9,244	Yea they act mean as hell for sure.I've had a few get on my back porch. __________________ _______________________ 2003 Cobra SOLD

02-04-2006, 09:21 PM	#3 (permalink)
Chuck Norris Junior Member Join Date: Jan 2006 Posts: 6	Fck opossums. __________________ Don't fcuk with Chuck!*

02-05-2006, 12:54 AM	#7 (permalink)
MattJ Senior Member Join Date: Dec 2004 Location: Racine, WI Posts: 10,243	My dogs got 3 rabbits this week, and reminants of another. Damn dogs try to bring em in the house too. They sit at the back door with a huge jackrabbit in there mouth expecting to come in the house with that damnn thing __________________ 2001 Mustang GT Premium - Mineral Grey

Thread Tools
Show Printable Version Email this Page
Display Modes
Linear Mode Switch to Hybrid Mode Switch to Threaded Mode

02-04-2006, 09:23 PM	#4 (permalink)
Jack The Ripper Posts: n/a	LMAO!!!!!!!!!! Dude, PETA would hate me for this but that right there was about the funniest goddamn thing i read all night. LMAO I could almost hear it in the voice of Billy Bob Thorton off Slingblade. Dat derre is a possum. dog be chewein dat dere pussum a bit. I reckon i put better put it down. i get my stick and hit it. *****um moves. i hit it again. moves and i hit it again. dog bites it some more. hit it again. dat dere possum eye pop out, plum near took his head off. bizgits and murrard uhmmm hummmm.

02-04-2006, 11:47 PM	#6 (permalink)
RedFirevert04GT Senior Member Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Va Beach, Va Posts: 336	ROFL!!! That's some funny **** right there. We had a beagle growing up and about 2 nights a week she would tree a possum and bark at it all night long. Dad would have to drag her in the house still barking. Even once she was in the house she'd whimper and whine. Finally one night she treed this thing on a branch that was just barely too high for her to get to, until the possum let it's tail down to tease her. She grabbed ahold of the tail and ripped the possum outta the tree. The next morning we found her sitting on the carport with a half eaten possum carcass with a million dollar grin. We finally got a good night's sleep the next night.