New Joke!
#1
12-16-2007, 04:16 AM
Join Date: May 2005
Location: Carthage, Missouri
Posts: 9,684
New Joke!
A guy calls a company and orders their 5-day, 10 lb. Weight loss
program.
The next day, there's a knock on the door and there stands before him
a voluptuous, athletic, 19 year old babe dressed in nothing but a pair
of Nike running shoes and a sign around her neck.
She introduces herself as a representative of the weight loss company.
The sign reads, 'If you can catch me, you can have me.' Without a
second thought, he takes off after her. A few miles later puffing and
puffing, he finally gives up. The same girl shows up for the next four
days and the same thing happens. On the fifth day, he weighs himself
and is delighted to find he has lost 10 lbs. As promised.
He calls the company and order s their 5-day/20 pound program. The next
day there's a knock at the door a nd there stands the most stunning,
beautiful, sexy woman he has ever seen in his life. She is wearing
nothing but Reebok Running shoes and a sign around her neck that
reads, 'If you catch me you can have me'
Well, he's out the door after her like a shot. This girl is in
excellent shape and he does his best, but no such luck. So for the
next four days, the same routine happens with him gradually getting in
better and better shape. Much to his delight on the fifth day when he
weighs himself, he discovers that he has lost another 20 lbs. As
promised. He decides to go for broke and calls the company to order
the 7-day/50 pound program.
'Are you sure?' asks the representative on the phone. 'This is our
most rigor ous program.' 'Absolutely,' he replies, 'I haven't felt this good in years.'
The next day there's a knock at the door; and when he opens it he
finds a huge muscular guy standing there wearing nothing but pink
running shoes and a sign around his neck that reads, 'If I catch you,
your *** is mine.'
He lost 63 pounds that week..
program.
The next day, there's a knock on the door and there stands before him
a voluptuous, athletic, 19 year old babe dressed in nothing but a pair
of Nike running shoes and a sign around her neck.
She introduces herself as a representative of the weight loss company.
The sign reads, 'If you can catch me, you can have me.' Without a
second thought, he takes off after her. A few miles later puffing and
puffing, he finally gives up. The same girl shows up for the next four
days and the same thing happens. On the fifth day, he weighs himself
and is delighted to find he has lost 10 lbs. As promised.
He calls the company and order s their 5-day/20 pound program. The next
day there's a knock at the door a nd there stands the most stunning,
beautiful, sexy woman he has ever seen in his life. She is wearing
nothing but Reebok Running shoes and a sign around her neck that
reads, 'If you catch me you can have me'
Well, he's out the door after her like a shot. This girl is in
excellent shape and he does his best, but no such luck. So for the
next four days, the same routine happens with him gradually getting in
better and better shape. Much to his delight on the fifth day when he
weighs himself, he discovers that he has lost another 20 lbs. As
promised. He decides to go for broke and calls the company to order
the 7-day/50 pound program.
'Are you sure?' asks the representative on the phone. 'This is our
most rigor ous program.' 'Absolutely,' he replies, 'I haven't felt this good in years.'
The next day there's a knock at the door; and when he opens it he
finds a huge muscular guy standing there wearing nothing but pink
running shoes and a sign around his neck that reads, 'If I catch you,
your *** is mine.'
He lost 63 pounds that week..
#2
12-16-2007, 04:35 AM
haha thats pretty funny. however if that girl came to my door. said if i catch her. with out stating how. id hop in the stang
#12
12-16-2007, 07:57 PM
i think it'd be nice to have a thread where there were constant jokes.
looking at the board first thing in the morning and having a laugh and looking at everyone elses beautiful stang would be a great way to start off the day!
looking at the board first thing in the morning and having a laugh and looking at everyone elses beautiful stang would be a great way to start off the day!
#14
12-16-2007, 08:05 PM
I think most people on this board are mature enough to be able to laugh at themselves.
#16
12-16-2007, 08:37 PM
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7X4U9iIyFjA
this isn't a joke, but a funny video i saw. i don't think it's that bad but, probably NSFW
this isn't a joke, but a funny video i saw. i don't think it's that bad but, probably NSFW
#17
12-16-2007, 09:17 PM
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7X4U9iIyFjA
this isn't a joke, but a funny video i saw. i don't think it's that bad but, probably NSFW
this isn't a joke, but a funny video i saw. i don't think it's that bad but, probably NSFW
#19
12-17-2007, 08:49 AM
Resident Mental Patient
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: Wappingers Falls, NuYawk
Posts: 2,834
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