Ponderisms: Add yours...
 

Are legless people offended by the phrase "United We Stand"?

Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet Soup?


If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests?

does an athiest feel bad spending money that says "In God We Trust"?

why does "fat chance" and "slim chance" mean the same thing?

testicals?!?!?!?! hahahahaha

And if women with big breasts work at hooters, do people with 1 leg work at IHOP?

Why do you drive on a parkway and park on a driveway?

Why do they call it taking a dump if you don't take it anywhere?

How come you can wear a cowboy hat and no one says anything, but you wear a viking helmet and people think you're crazy.

just got these by email the other day...

Gardening Rule: When weeding, the best way to make sure you are removing a weed and not a valuable plant is to pull on it. If it comes out of the ground easily, it is a valuable plant.

The easiest way to find something lost around the house is to buy a replacement.

Never take life seriously. Nobody gets out alive anyway.

There are two kinds of pedestrians: the quick and the dead.

Life is sexually transmitted.

Health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.

The only difference between a rut and a grave is the depth.

Some people are like Slinkies. Not really good for anything, but you still can't help but smile when you see one tumble down the stairs.

Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing.

Have you noticed since everyone has a camcorder these days no one talks about seeing UFOs like they used to?

Whenever I feel blue, I start breathing again.

All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism.

In the 60's, people took acid to make the world weird. Now the world is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.

How is it one careless match can start a forest fire, but it takes a whole box to start a campfire?

Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I think I'll squeeze these dangly things here, and drink whatever comes out?"

Who was the first person to say, "See that chicken there? I'm gonna eat the next thing that comes outta its butt."

Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?

Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don't point to their crotch when they ask where the bathroom is?

LOL. This is the kind of weird topics that start when you start a thread at 3 in the morning!!!

Who saw a horse and thought of making it into glue?

Yop, i was at work.

To be or not to be? That is the question...:shifty:

you suck

I know...:(

why is it called a "hys"terectomy when it actually happens to "her"?

Why is it called "men"opause when it happens to "women"?

damn ,thas pretty good, i'm atheist and i've never even thought of that one, i've thought of it bein in the pledge of allegiance, national anthem, etc. but not that...

free post?

Thats like history being "His Story" not hers.

yeah i was on DEX when i thought of it.....:) hahahahahaha

Why do good that travel by boat go by the name of cargo, and things that travel by truck go by shipment.

If we squeeze olives to get olive oil, how do we get baby oil...

Why does it cost only $210 to get married but it costs over $5,000 to get divorced. http://www.mcmmotorsports.com/smilies/shrug.gif

holy dead post revival batman...stupid ass spammer....

Hey I have a light in my freezer!

Why is it called PMS?
becasue mad cow disease was already taken!
not a ponderism but i liked it.

How does a blind person know when they're done wiping?? :shakeno:

DO BURN VICTIMS GET A DISCOUNT AT THE CREMATORIUM?

hahahaha

:flameON:

Is it rude to burp during oral sex?

why oh why does cancer have to be associated with eating a girl out these days? first french fries lead to heart disease...now this....that really bites...couldnt God just leave that one alone....how the hell else am i gonna get girls to overlook the fact that i eat my soup with my hands?

Wh-WHAT?!

Why is there handicap parking at skating rinks? :D

Why is there braille on drive-up ATM machines?:eek: