The Lounge This is the General Talk forum.

New Joke!

Thread Tools
 
Search this Thread
 
Old Dec 16, 2007 | 04:16 AM
  #1  
Lances03SVT's Avatar
Thread Starter
|
Super Moderator
Joined: May 2005
Posts: 9,684
From: Carthage, Missouri
Default New Joke!

A guy calls a company and orders their 5-day, 10 lb. Weight loss
program.

The next day, there's a knock on the door and there stands before him
a voluptuous, athletic, 19 year old babe dressed in nothing but a pair
of Nike running shoes and a sign around her neck.

She introduces herself as a representative of the weight loss company.
The sign reads, 'If you can catch me, you can have me.' Without a
second thought, he takes off after her. A few miles later puffing and
puffing, he finally gives up. The same girl shows up for the next four
days and the same thing happens. On the fifth day, he weighs himself
and is delighted to find he has lost 10 lbs. As promised.

He calls the company and order s their 5-day/20 pound program. The next
day there's a knock at the door a nd there stands the most stunning,
beautiful, sexy woman he has ever seen in his life. She is wearing
nothing but Reebok Running shoes and a sign around her neck that
reads, 'If you catch me you can have me'

Well, he's out the door after her like a shot. This girl is in
excellent shape and he does his best, but no such luck. So for the
next four days, the same routine happens with him gradually getting in
better and better shape. Much to his delight on the fifth day when he
weighs himself, he discovers that he has lost another 20 lbs. As
promised. He decides to go for broke and calls the company to order
the 7-day/50 pound program.

'Are you sure?' asks the representative on the phone. 'This is our
most rigor ous program.' 'Absolutely,' he replies, 'I haven't felt this good in years.'


The next day there's a knock at the door; and when he opens it he
finds a huge muscular guy standing there wearing nothing but pink
running shoes and a sign around his neck that reads, 'If I catch you,
your *** is mine.'

He lost 63 pounds that week..
 
Old Dec 16, 2007 | 04:35 AM
  #2  
CarnageCAB's Avatar
Senior Member
Joined: Nov 2007
Posts: 152
From: Lugoff, South Carolina
Default

haha thats pretty funny. however if that girl came to my door. said if i catch her. with out stating how. id hop in the stang
 
Old Dec 16, 2007 | 05:41 AM
  #3  
rebelprettyboy's Avatar
Joined: Nov 2007
Posts: 92
Default

Originally Posted by CarnageCAB
haha thats pretty funny. however if that girl came to my door. said if i catch her. with out stating how. id hop in the stang

haha i feel ya!!!

haha funny joke
 
Old Dec 16, 2007 | 06:20 AM
  #4  
TJeffer3's Avatar
Senior Member
Joined: Dec 2005
Posts: 245
From: Tx
Default

I would of caught her ***. I would of had a trap set up by the second day. LOL
 
Old Dec 16, 2007 | 07:19 AM
  #5  
machnjo's Avatar
Senior Member
Joined: Apr 2006
Posts: 1,085
From: Austin, Texas
Default

Originally Posted by TJeffer3
I would of caught her ***. I would of had a trap set up by the second day. LOL
ROFLMAO, werd !!!
 
Old Dec 16, 2007 | 07:21 AM
  #6  
HighSchoolGT's Avatar
Senior Member
Joined: Nov 2007
Posts: 100
From: Albuquerque
Default

haha thats a pretty funny one lance
 
Old Dec 16, 2007 | 09:10 AM
  #7  
Hotrod92's Avatar
Banned
Joined: Dec 2007
Posts: 57
From: Somewhere Out There
Default

nice
 

Last edited by Hotrod92; Dec 16, 2007 at 09:12 AM.
Old Dec 16, 2007 | 12:37 PM
  #8  
3.8for the win's Avatar
Evolution 9
Joined: Sep 2007
Posts: 3,887
Default

lol thats a good one.
 
Old Dec 16, 2007 | 12:56 PM
  #9  
Nofire's Avatar
Sooner #65
Joined: Dec 2004
Posts: 755
From: University of Oklahoma
Default

LOL, nice....
 
Old Dec 16, 2007 | 06:05 PM
  #10  
foncarelli's Avatar
Everyday Im Hustlin
Joined: Jun 2005
Posts: 3,970
From: Ecorse, Michigan
Default

Lance is a big hit at all the parties.
 
Old Dec 16, 2007 | 07:40 PM
  #11  
gotMACH04's Avatar
Senior Member
Joined: Aug 2006
Posts: 770
From: Columbia,KY
Default

lol
 
Old Dec 16, 2007 | 07:57 PM
  #12  
lanmas23's Avatar
Senior Member
Joined: Mar 2006
Posts: 414
From: Greenfield, Indiana
Default

i think it'd be nice to have a thread where there were constant jokes.

looking at the board first thing in the morning and having a laugh and looking at everyone elses beautiful stang would be a great way to start off the day!
 
Old Dec 16, 2007 | 08:02 PM
  #13  
Hotrod92's Avatar
Banned
Joined: Dec 2007
Posts: 57
From: Somewhere Out There
Default

Originally Posted by lanmas23
i think it'd be nice to have a thread where there were constant jokes.

looking at the board first thing in the morning and having a laugh and looking at everyone elses beautiful stang would be a great way to start off the day!
someone would end up butt hurt though, and then there would be chaos.
 
Old Dec 16, 2007 | 08:05 PM
  #14  
HighSchoolGT's Avatar
Senior Member
Joined: Nov 2007
Posts: 100
From: Albuquerque
Default

Originally Posted by Hotrod92
someone would end up butt hurt though, and then there would be chaos.
I think most people on this board are mature enough to be able to laugh at themselves.
 
Old Dec 16, 2007 | 08:08 PM
  #15  
Hotrod92's Avatar
Banned
Joined: Dec 2007
Posts: 57
From: Somewhere Out There
Default

Originally Posted by HighSchoolGT
I think most people on this board are mature enough to be able to laugh at themselves.
hopefully.
 
Old Dec 16, 2007 | 08:37 PM
  #16  
lanmas23's Avatar
Senior Member
Joined: Mar 2006
Posts: 414
From: Greenfield, Indiana
Default

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7X4U9iIyFjA

this isn't a joke, but a funny video i saw. i don't think it's that bad but, probably NSFW
 
Old Dec 16, 2007 | 09:17 PM
  #17  
Hotrod92's Avatar
Banned
Joined: Dec 2007
Posts: 57
From: Somewhere Out There
Default

Originally Posted by lanmas23
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7X4U9iIyFjA

this isn't a joke, but a funny video i saw. i don't think it's that bad but, probably NSFW
ahahahahaha!!! That's golden!
 
Old Dec 17, 2007 | 08:38 AM
  #18  
Steeda97's Avatar
banzai
Joined: Apr 2007
Posts: 4,546
From: South Jersey
Default

hahahaha. thats funny.
 
Old Dec 17, 2007 | 08:49 AM
  #19  
mcmmotorsports's Avatar
Resident Mental Patient
Joined: Apr 2006
Posts: 2,834
From: Wappingers Falls, NuYawk
Default

OH MY!!!
 
Old Dec 17, 2007 | 05:16 PM
  #20  
mustangvsix's Avatar
4 point 6
Joined: Sep 2005
Posts: 3,347
From: Flagstaff, Az / Los Alamos, NM
Default

that was pretty good.
 
Old Dec 17, 2007 | 05:50 PM
  #21  
HighSchoolGT's Avatar
Senior Member
Joined: Nov 2007
Posts: 100
From: Albuquerque
Default

lawl
 
Old Dec 18, 2007 | 04:57 PM
  #22  
foncarelli's Avatar
Everyday Im Hustlin
Joined: Jun 2005
Posts: 3,970
From: Ecorse, Michigan
Default

Originally Posted by mcmmotorsports
OH MY!!!
 
Related Topics
Thread
Thread Starter
Forum
Replies
Last Post
SlicK
Political Talk
0
Sep 8, 2006 07:11 PM
trnin
The Lounge
8
May 3, 2006 07:21 PM
foncarelli
The Lounge
4
Jul 27, 2005 05:52 AM
foncarelli
The Lounge
0
Jul 22, 2005 12:55 PM
foncarelli
The Lounge
1
Jul 21, 2005 03:13 PM




All times are GMT -7. The time now is 03:03 PM.