ok guys... I'll try to explain quickly and tell why my life is sucking...

I met a girl september and she' the most amazing person I've ever met. end of story. ok, not end of story...but she rocked in every way.

So up til januray, we were awesome friends, just waiting for the right time to become more than friends, and then(for reason that I dont need to explain) we decided being just friends was best(dont get ideas, no sex or anything physcial was involved in this decision).

So we decide to be just friends and no more and also not tell eachother about our feelings for other people, as to prevent the other person from getting jealous or anything.

So til the end of february, we were 'just friends' until about 2 weeks ago, she revealed that she still has very strong feelings for me and so I was EXSTATIC!!!! so the whole week went incredibly and then she had a missions trip to brazil to go to.

So she gets back and tells me that she feels called to do missions in either africa or brazil(please, nobody knock religion or anything, this isn't what the thread is about). and so I get the feeling it's coming...and so I ask "does this mean that we're back to 'just friends' like before 2 weeks ago?" and she confirmed.

Now I know she is for real about this. It's not some other guy, nor some crazy lie she made up. She truly does feel called(and is in prayer and everything about how she should go about it). And since my career(computer engineering) can really only realistically be held in the U.S., we have little to no future together.

My question is...should I cease all communication with her? Talking to her only makes feelings come back(unless I just try hard, but then it doesnt feel natural). And we dont actually really ever see eachother on a weekly/monthly basis so its possible to stop talking to her altogether but... MAN she was just everything I want in a girl(and I'm picky).

help??? anyone!

 

Dan:

A big part of relationships is timing....timing is everything. She could be the right one, but just not the right time.

The reality is that she feel more "called" to do somethingelse then to be with you right now. It is a harsh reality, but it is the truth.

Sure, talk to her if you want....keep things open, but it may prevent you from seeing the forest through the trees and meeting another girl. Being occupied makes it harder to see.

All you can do is wait. There will be others.

 

I personally wouldnt break communication, I dont see purpose in that ever, with anyone. I think it's just flat out dumb/stupid IMHO.

I would just continue being friends and if communications fades out, than ok, thats a little different. I wouldnt end it all together all of a sudden. Just go on with life I guess is what I'm saying.

 

Yeah, this is the sucky part where I have to believe and understand that there really is someone else out there who'll make me even happier than this other girl did. right now, it doesnt seem possible, but quite honestly, this is the 3rd time I met an incredible girl and thought noone could be better. So for that, I really shouldn't worry...but this girl was so freakin awesome...ugh, it just sucks.

 

AMEN to that brotha... my advice is since you don't have as much invested in it as you would if you had been goin out, look for another girl to just hang out wit get your mind off her and you'll see she'll soon disappear, i been in a relationship 9 months and to be honest i'm startin to get the feelin i might have to start lookin at my other options here pretty soon as we both agree we drive each other crazy... oh well ur in college bro, u shouldn't be worryin about the "RIGHT" one... everyone know's they usually find something when their not lookin for it...

Good luck though...

PS where in Africa is she thinkin she's hearin the call cuz there are alota places Americans aren't welcome, helpful or not, and women esspecially...

 

Try not to break off communications, but also don't try the long distance relationships. What Grimmz said, meet different women...take them home...sex them up, whatever. If that doesn't work, well ****. You're outta luck. On other hand, you could shave your head..quite your job..put a tie on..ride a bike to the boondocks..and sail to Africa and be with the woman you "love". Go for it buddy.

 

"Wanting things is more fun than having them." - Tanner's (frito's) dad.

 

LMAO u've seen the notebook one too many times...

 

haha whats wrong with the notebook?

 

Tell her how you fell, what have you got to lose???

 

You disagree?

 

I wouldn't break communication off but I would lay back a bit. She sounds like a great girl and I think it is great that she is going into missions.. We need more people who are willing to do that.

I'd say keep in touch, she may decide to come back someday and maybe then things will work out, but in the meantime, don't hold out for her, Keep your eyes open, there are lots of great girls out there.

 

She already knows how I feel. She knows it'll take me time to completely get over her. Thing is, sure we could date right now but in another year or so, she'll be actually out of country almost full time so sicne I coudlnt move, we woudlnt work out. So staying just friends is the most we can do without our feelings being put on the line.

 

IDBFTW

that is all.

 

If she chose to leave the country after you guyz were together then she chose to also not be with you, hence u can't fix it because she doesn't want it fixed... sry bro, my g/f choose to go to a school in PA instead of somethin down here in FL, we will see what happens...

What the hell does that stand for : I Don't Believe Fat Tots wiggle?

 

LMAO AHAHAH i knowi shouldnt be laughin, sry Danny but he's right, and trust me i know it's guna bite mein the foot when/if my g/f and I break up but it's like you live in FL, u got a nice car, and your that funny guy, how are you not gettin girls at your feet, next time your at a club just request the Numa Numa song and do a little dance you'll thank me later...

LoL Cheers and good luck...

 

are you joking????

In da butt for the win


words to live by

 

yeah sry neva heard that one before... sry guyz... i'm not exactly the *** jokeying type...LoL but if thats how you like it...LoL

 

hahahahahahahaha

 

here's my 2 cents. Ur young, u're going to change, life is going to take u both to different places. however, timing IS everything in a relationship. she may be the right one for u, and this may just be the wrong time. don't stop talking to her, but don't try to wait for her. go on with ur life, but keep talking to her. maybe not everyday, but don't loose touch. You may find someone else u like better, or not. in anycase, there's no sense in just dropping her b/c things aren't going the way you want right now. love is a ****ty emotion, and yet the only one ppl will go crazy without. life goes on, let it take u both where it will, and maybe it will bring u back together, maybe it will 10 yrs, maybe it will even take more than 1 marriage! lol. but there's no sense in loosing friends b/c ur not immiediatly satisfied. hell, u may even find someone u like better in a couple years and be like "thank god I didn't do anything extreme or rash." and if u do think she is so perfect and cool, than that means that u 2 should be good as friends... in which case, friendship is the foundation of a realtionship. if u remain friends though all this and come back together in a couple years, then u 2 will have a very strong base on ur relationship, and things should go a lot smoother.... but then... the decision is urs.... just make it wisely, and with ur head, not ur heart or dick....

 

Amen.....you just described my weekends in a nutshell. Yea danny we need to get you out and about....